Choose wisely

#choice #meaning #livingfornow #selfdevelopment #katiekirkpatrick

When I have trouble finding anything positive in the moment I think of the images of this beautiful bride on her special day.  

Katie Kirkpatrick's Wedding Day

Many of you might have seen them before.  The story and images circulated a lot in 2009.  They're inspirational and uplifting and very very sad all at the same time.  

The truth is any day could be our last.  At any point we might get that pain in the chest that won't go away, the diagnosis from our Doctor that we dread to hear, the accident that catches us on our blindside.

We're all vulnerable out there.  That doesn't mean you should wrap yourself in cotton wool and hide under the blankets.  You still might get hit by a meteorite in your bed or be stuck there when a fire breaks out in your house!  

I would argue that _understanding and accepting how short our lives are is part of the path to living a fulfilled and happy life_.

Viktor Frankl is another inspiration to me when times are tough.  He found humanity  and freedom and understanding in a concentration camp during a horrific time of personal loss.  A place of execution and death.  Where you would think hope was dead and nothing reigned but despair and desperation.  

Doctor Kurt Van Wyk is also an inspiration to me.  You probably haven't heard of him.  He was my chiropractor and he passed away last year after a battle with cancer.  His funeral was hugely attended and I while I knew he was an amazing man just from how he helped me, I had no idea of the impact he had made.  A small unimpressive office in a strip mall which was always busy but not insanely so.  At his funeral I heard things I'd known and also things I hadn't known.  How he discounted his services for the clergy, how he treated patients free of charge for months or years when they had circumstances where they couldn't pay, and how he touched the lives of many many people in small but deep and meaningful ways.  The large church was packed to standing room and the eulogies and respect flowed.

Seeing Doctor Kurt's impact through the eyes of the people who's lives he changed I realized there was so much more I could be doing to help others than I had been doing.  There were small things he did every day.  Small interactions that made the man into a force for good in the world.  He empowered and supported and healed others with his time.

We're all sending out ripples constantly in this ocean we call life.  The ripples from others wash over us all the time and they can lift us up to the sky or drag us down into the depths.  Our own ripples might be small little circles that travel only a small way or they might be mighty waves that surge out from us.  The question is do our ripples buoy people up and carry them on to their destination or do our ripples swamp over them or push them backwards?  In my case I really want my ripples to be the former kind because I feel responsible for the ripples I send out and because I want to make a positive difference in the lives of others.  Because I feel compassion for others and how I affect them.  Do you?

If people like Victor and Katie and Kurt can find a path to meaning and freedom in the circumstances of their lives, then it becomes obvious to me our state of mind is something that we do have control over.  Just like our actions.  We might be fighting our own bodies or brains on a chemical or physiological level.  We might be experiencing circumstances that most people, thankfully, will never come close to being tested under.

*But while we have limited control any of the external stuff that happens to us, we have control over our response and how we react to it.*

So I'm going to send a little ripple out right now.  The next time things are tough for you.  When you think it's all a little too hard.  When maybe the challenge feels less like a challenge and more like an ass whipping being handed down to you by life.  I challenge you to find your own inspirational thoughts and your own inspirational people.  I challenge you to find the levers that help you move yourself to the state you want to be in when you want to be in it.  Meditation, Music, laughter, smiling, hugs, and beauty can all perhaps move you from a dark place into the light if you use them right.  In the case of severe depression it might take even take drugs and therapy and other tools external to help you.  Whatever the tools you need you should do your best to figure them out and use them to supplement your own personal power.

Above all remember you have more power and freedom than you perhaps realize.  You have the ability to choose how you react.  Choose wisely.  Choose the path that lets you spread some ripples of your own.